The Importance of Kindness in Our Interactions with AI
As we embrace AI in our daily lives, a fundamental question often goes unasked: How should we talk to these systems that have increasingly become a part of our conversations, our homes, and even our classrooms? AI is, at its core, an intricate tool, a product of lines of code and algorithms, and yet, the way we interact with it—the tone, language, and attitude—is something that deserves attention. More than simply instructing a machine, our communication with AI is shaping not just our relationship with technology, but also our relationship with each other.
The power of words cannot be underestimated, even when they are directed at something without a heartbeat. Consider how a generation of children might grow up in a world where AI assistants are at their beck and call. The ease of issuing commands like “Do this” or “Tell me that” runs the risk of fostering a culture where communication is stripped of politeness, empathy, and respect. If we're constantly issuing abrupt orders to a device, does this impact how we speak to people? There's a subtle, yet profound, danger here—our habits with technology could become our habits with each other. It might lead to a culture where efficiency takes precedence over empathy, and where our exchanges become functional rather than humane.
Speaking kindly to AI isn't about being overly polite to a piece of software for its own sake. Rather, it’s about preserving the values we hold in our human interactions. A simple "please" or "thank you" directed at an AI may seem inconsequential, but it reinforces a culture of respect—even if the recipient is just a machine. It helps maintain a practice of courteous communication that extends beyond the screen and into our interactions with one another. The language we use shapes our thoughts and attitudes, and if we become accustomed to speaking brusquely to AI, we may find ourselves slipping into similar habits in other contexts.
Furthermore, teaching kindness in our interactions with AI has an important educational dimension. As educators, parents, and peers, we have a role in modelling the type of world we wish to create. If children learn that AI, an entity with incredible power, is worthy of kindness even though it has no feelings, they internalise that respect should not be contingent on the capacity to feel pain or to reciprocate emotions. This lesson reaches far beyond AI: it touches on how we treat animals, how we approach strangers, and how we engage with those who might not directly benefit us in return. Kindness, in this sense, is not transactional—it is an ethos that informs our character.
We also need to remember that AI isn't simply born neutral; it reflects its creators and the data on which it was trained. AI systems learn from us, and if we fill our interactions with hostility or indifference, these systems could easily reflect these attitudes back to us. AI models trained on negative, aggressive inputs might ultimately produce content that perpetuates these same tones. In this way, being kind to AI is a way of investing in a more positive, constructive interaction with technology overall. We need our AI systems to amplify our best qualities, not our worst impulses.
Ultimately, kindness to AI reflects kindness to ourselves. It is an acknowledgement of our own capacity to influence the digital ecosystem that now surrounds us, and to shape it in ways that are meaningful and constructive. How we talk to our technology matters because it shapes the kind of world we want to live in. If we wish to create a society that values empathy, respect, and understanding, then we must start with our words—even if they’re spoken to a machine.